In June, I took two weeks off for a family vacation and it was pretty awesome. I was very happy to get some time away to decompress and spend time with my family. After getting home a few weeks ago, I have been asked why we decided to take a vacation so early into the summer especially in the middle of season where Storehouse McAllen had started a new sermon series and launching a small initiative.

I haven’t posted on here as regularly as I would have hoped so I thought I’d share what’s been going on behind the scenes with our family life.

THE FALL SEASON

As Rebecca and I looked at our calendar, we realized that we were going to be experiencing one thing after another toward the tail-end of the summer and time away as a family would be a little more difficult. For starters, Chango is starting high school this year! It’s so crazy to see him hammering out summer projects for his freshmen classes and watching him mature in academic discipline is quite a sight. In any case, as an incoming freshmen, he’s got a couple of things coming up in July and August like marching camp for band and then a week long writing workshop.

Secondly, Rebecca and I have been monitoring some areas of concern on the health side of things and we had scheduled a doctor’s appointment where the results were going to impact a couple of changes in our family dynamics in order to stay healthy so we needed to prioritize that by simply being home.

Thirdly, our step-daughter is pregnant with our second grandkid. WHAT THE CRAP. I don’t think I have mentioned that I’m a grandfather, have I? That’s another post. Well, while Savanna (who I call “Flaca”) is doing her preggo thing, I’ll be taking care of our granddaughter, Delilah, and she just has my heart so if it’s watching 2348 hours of the same movie, then that’s what we’re doing; maybe taking a walk from time to time too. Savanna’s baby is due the week Chango goes back to school so that’ll be a tight schedule.

And finally, I’ll be guest preaching at other churches in Texas for friends in the month of August so I’ll be doing a little bit of traveling and driving. Needless to say, August will be pretty nuts and this is, in a nutshell, why we took time off as soon as Chango was out of school.

WHAT DID YOU DO ON VACATION?

We drove. We drove a lot.

Our vacation started off with the bouncing around of a few cities and it was all great. It was just a lot of driving. Rebecca and I started our time by driving to Ft. Worth, TX where we had to participate in an assessment with Acts 29 where pastors along with their wives come in and check in on how we’re doing and ask a bunch of questions to assess our spiritual and emotional health. Overall, it was a great experience and I’m very thankful for Acts 29.

Following our time in Ft. Worth, we made a pit-stop in Denton, TX to visit with friends over some drinks to celebrate the end of a season, the assessment, and the time away that we were about to embark on. After cocktails (and then coffee), we drove back down to Austin where we met up with Rebecca’s mom to pick up Chango and spend a night in Austin as we prepped to head to Albuquerque, New Mexico.

We made some stops along the way, like hanging out at Yellow House Coffee in Lubbock which is always a great place for coffee. It was good to stretch the legs and play cards over really good coffee. Once we got to Albuquerque, all I wanted to do was sit in the quiet. We were able to get an AIRBNB near the Sandia mountains and all I wanted to do was listen to the wind and not talk for a few days and my wife is so awesome that she gave me that time as soon as we got in.

Rebecca works a couple of days out of the week and she wanted to get some more intentional one on one time with Chango so they hung out with friends, ate together, and visited a bunch of local places in the city while I sat outside in silence. It was great. I really dig Albuquerque because it’s quiet for a big city, not too different from Valley culture, and I love the mountains and better weather (no humidity). We stayed in Albuquerque for about 10 days and it was well spent; whether sitting outside in silence or learning more about Dungeons and Dragons with Chango or having a family dinner out in the city, it was perfect.

Once we left Albuquerque, we traveled back down to San Antonio. I got another day of silence while Rebecca and Chango hung out with Flaca and Delilah. We all grabbed dinner, made plans to attend our friend’s church (The Well Community Church), and make one last trip to IKEA and finally head back to the Valley.

Obviously, I’ve left out a ton, but it was a great time away and it was certainly needed because to be honest, I am not the most faithful at taking intentional time off. It’s something that was addressed during the assessment, but also something that my staff frequently reminds me of. I’ll talk more about the path to pursuing spiritual and emotional health later, but I hope this settles some of the questions we’ve been getting. And thank you so much for praying for me and my family while we were gone.

I am also extremely grateful to my staff at Storehouse McAllen who held the fort and especially Nano who did some amazing work in preaching the word of God to the people of God while I was out! If you haven’t listened to his sermons, you need to. i hope this is the first of many posts as the summer moves along and I hope that you’re enjoying your summer too!

1. PRAY

I feel like this sounds obvious, but I cannot stress it enough. During your day, be sure to schedule or block appointed times of prayer, especially before meeting with an individual or couple. This is vital because it'll do a few things.

First, prayer connects you with the God of the Bible and places you in a position of humility before God. Second, prayer helps to remind you that the same God you're asking people to fix their eyes upon is the same God you're turning to. And third, prayer reminds you and whoever you meet with that you're hope is not in yourself or them, but Christ.

2. PREPARE

While part of your job is to be present, don't be afraid to have an agenda in order to stay on topic, but also to help you bring the conversation back to the gospel. I've walked into several counseling appointments without any sort of a plan and there have been some appointments that should have lasted an hour but went three hours. Or I've had appointments that should have lasted three hours, but I only spent an hour with members.

An agenda helps you stay on track in the conversation and also reassures those you're meeting that you're looking to get to the heart of their disconnect with God and one another. Additionally, an agenda helps you stay organized should you recommend practical next steps; this helps those you're meeting with a direction.

3. FURTHER CARE

It is perfectly normal to refer people to professional and licensed counselors. You're not going to have all of the answers. Your job is to point them to Jesus AND some need further care that is outside of your wheel house. I think many leaders often place a great deal of pressure on themselves to be someone they’re not or feel pressured by others to be someone they’re not; just because you’ve hit a wall doesn’t mean you’ve failed.

Make sure to have a list of counselors in your area that you trust and potentially have partnered with.

The ministry of counseling is certainly one that needs to be handled with great care and sensitivity, but you should also be aware of your limitations and do not be afraid to ask for help. The goal is to walk others toward hope in Christ and it is also equally important to cast our burdens on God because He cares for us just as much as He care for those we’re caring for.

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